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How To Speak Zombie Helps You Negotiate with Flesh Eaters

By: Matt Ho - Published: Oct 18, 2011 • References: amazon and theawesomer
I suppose if the idea of decapitating a head isn't the ideal way to handle the undead for you, you could probably try talking to them with the How To Speak Zombie guidebook.

It turns out that all the mindless groaning and moaning that's heard from the undead is an actual language. Steve Mockus' How To Speak Zombie is a tutorial that will teach anyone how to communicate with mindless flesh eaters, or at least blend in with them. You'll also learn their customs and etiquette, which may show they're still human after all -- somewhat, anyway.

So if you want to avoid being eaten alive, read How To Speak Zombie and learn to ask nicely. In the case of a failed negotiation, you can always introduce the undead to your pump-action shotgun.