The Poo~Pourri Spray Turns the Smell of Feces into Bouquets of Flowers

It's not like anyone is counting the seconds you've been away from your table, desk or sofa, but Poo~Pourri is designed to lessen any lingering smells or discomfort for when you finally do return. Coming in a creative plethora of scents -- like the Trap-A-Clap, Deja Poo and the Dooper Pooper -- the Poo~Pourri is designed to eliminate any odors from emanating; as the company's commercial puts it, before "a creamy behemoth from [the] cavenous bowels" is laid.

Founded by Suzy Batiz, who has a background in aromatherapy, Poo~Pourri works when the mix of essential oils from the spray lays a coating that traps the odors "in the porcelain prison" before they escape. When the fecal matter finally drops, the film releases a pleasant aroma that masks the real noxious fetor. At prices starting from $25 for the starter pack and $58 for the family pack, the company claims to have already sold 4 million bottles. As it were, the world will never come to doubt the quality of your feces, and be convinced that may in fact "you never poop at all."