Condom Dispensers Edit
The "Don't Panic" is Anything but Discreet

OK… let’s think about this one out loud. A giant yellow box with a bright red button. Don’t panic? For the right guy, this might work as some sort of ice breaker.

For the other 99% of the male population, expect something like this, “What’s that by your bed? Oh. A condom dispenser… Not just a condom or even two but, a whole dispenser… You know, I totally forgot about meeting my girlfriend tonight…”

Girl exits.

Stick to the discreet, store-it-in-the-drawer approach.